Üsküdar University Faculty of Health Sciences Child Development Department Lecturer Merve Yüksel and Research Assistant Pınar Demir Asma evaluated the development of sexual identity in children.

Stating that children's sense of sexual identity settles in the first 4 years, experts offer important advice to parents. Stating that children mostly understand the distinction between boys and girls around the age of 2-3, experts emphasized the importance of correct behaviors in the development of sexual identity. Stating that sexual education starts from birth, experts state that the child's gender should be treated and privacy should be taken care of.

Appropriate biological development is also required

Lecturer Merve Yüksel stated that children's sense of sexual identity settles in their first 4 years and says, “Children usually understand the separation between boys and girls around the age of 2-3. At the same time, they understand whether they are a girl or a boy. At this age, they show their interest in sexual matters with their questions and behaviors. In order for a suitable sexual identity to develop, an appropriate biological development is required first. It is appropriate for children's sex organs to display normal structural features and for their hormones to be secreted in accordance with their gender. If the development of children in line with their existing sexual equipment is supported in accordance with their own gender, the identity of a girl or boy will develop in a healthy way. said.

Correct behaviors are important in the development of sexual identity.

Instructor Merve Yüksel listed the issues that parents should pay attention to in the development of sexual identity of children as follows:

Sex education should begin with birth. Beginning from the first months, care should be taken to behave in accordance with the gender of the baby. Privacy should be especially respected.
Behaviors that unnecessarily stimulate the child's curiosity should be avoided. E.g; like walking around naked, witnessing the sexual intercourse of your parents.
The attention and importance given by the family to the genital areas of the 1.5-3 year old child may lead to feelings of prohibition and embarrassment in the child. It is not appropriate to reward or punish sexual games and questions by the family.

Boys should have the opportunity to identify

It is important whether there are suitable identification models especially in the 3-5 age group. A boy should have the opportunity to identify with a father or a man who takes the place of father. It is important that the sexual identity of the father model is well established and mature. Those who have a faint, passive, insecure or exaggerated sense of masculinity, bully, overly harsh, etc. A father with these characteristics will negatively affect this development.

Identification is also very important for girls.

In the same way, it is valid for the girl to identify with the mother or a model that replaces the mother. A strong, authoritarian, masculine or very oppressed, faint mother will negatively affect her sexual identity development.

Information on the development of sexual identity can be given around the age of 3-4.

Research Assistant Pınar Demir Asma stated that it is important to give information about the development of sexual identity to children and said, “Sexual identity is the inner perception or feeling of being a woman or a man. The sexual identity of the child is formed and developed after the interaction of biological, psychological, social and mental processes of sexuality. This development begins to occur in the first years of life. It is known that core sexual identity begins in the first two years of childhood, but it is around 3-4 years old that the sense of sexual identity settles. Information on the subject should also be given in a short and concise language within the scope of the questions asked only by children in this age range.” gave advice.

Boundaries should be taught after the age of 2

Research Assistant Pınar Demir Asma listed her suggestions to parents as follows:

“The development of a child's sexual identity begins with the family's acceptance of his or her sexual identity.
After the age of two, the child can distinguish between the child's body and his own body (borderlines about his own body and the body of others can be taught).
When children reach the age of 3, girls begin to identify with their mothers and boys with their fathers. For example, behaviors such as wearing the clothes of the parents, shaving like the father for men, wearing the mother's shoes, using the mother's make-up can be seen. For example, during this period, children may claim that they will marry their parents, in which case an answer may be given such as 'I love you, I know you love me too, but you cannot marry parents'.

Parents, heed these tips.

Pointing out the importance of how and in what way information about sexual identity development is given, Research Assistant Pınar Demir Asma said:

Information should be transferred in a simple way,
Simple and clear language should be used,
It should be read from the books on the subject,
Use concrete examples, such as drawings, dolls, toys, puppets,
Only the information that the child needs should be given, the questions he/she asks should be answered,
It should be determined what and how much the child wants to learn about sexual identity,
The child should be recognized and information appropriate for their developmental period should be given,
It is important that adults give this information in children's language,
Correct words should be chosen,
Gender identity education must be given in line with values
They should inform that the body is private and belong to the individual, and parents should show this situation with their behaviors,
Information on sexual identity should be obtained from the family, which is the most trusted and correct person,
Respect for sexual identity should be taught,
Adults should also do research on topics that they do not know.

Child's Sex Education Starts From Birth