Assistant Professor Elif Erol said, "The main problem is the breath that children cannot take in their compressed lives, indexed to education rather than fear of covid."
Since the day it entered our lives in 2020, covid has caused quite a few changes in our lives. We feel incomplete when we do not have the spares of our masks that we shelter like armor in our pockets and antiviral solutions in our bags. In this process, it is difficult to keep up with our changing daily life, to mourn our material and moral losses and to learn to continue without them; Another is the course of the process. What happens to children in the pandemic while we are struggling as adults? The answer to this important question is Istanbul Rumeli University Department of Psychology Dr. Lecturer Elif EROL, its member, answers:
“In this process, school home became virtual reality in the lives of children. We forcibly ignited the tablets we took from their hands. The means of pleasure turned into means of persecution. The main problem is the breath that children cannot take in their compressed lives, indexed to education rather than fear of covid. Of course, families who are in the first grade this year have relatively high academic concerns for their children and this is understandable, changing educational platforms may also cause concern, virtual education may not be sufficient and a desire for additional support may arise. However, the relationship between the parental attitude shown against all these and the losses in the child's life should not be overlooked. The children, who felt the educational pressure on them more than they could handle, started to develop feelings of fear, avoidance and anger instead of love, affection and trust towards their families. ''
The children are very worn out spiritually
Mentioning that children are also affected by the pandemic, Erol continued his words as follows: “Some of the parents seem to be trying to achieve their dominance in the outside world, which they cannot control, with the control over their children. Undoubtedly, they do this unintentionally and without perceiving that they can cause harm. They try to balance their children's lost social lives and other developmental skills by clinging to academic success. Of course, education is essential, but it is not possible to talk about education without health. Health is defined by the World Health Organization as a state of complete mental and physical well-being. The children may not have a physical problem, but they are mentally beaten at least as much as we do. Many scientific publications have revealed that cognitive learning can be disrupted in an environment that is not mentally peaceful. In other words, if a child has high anxiety, fears, anger, it may show learning problems such as not understanding what he read, reluctance to learn, attention and concentration disorders. From this point of view, there are numerous benefits for their children and their relationships in that parents evaluate their current attitudes and show the necessary flexibility. ''
Fear of illness engulfed the children
Underlining that another important issue apart from the educational pressure is the fear of illness in children, Istanbul Rumeli University Department of Psychology Dr. Lecturer Elif EROL; “This fear in children actually belongs to their parents. Many children substitute their parents' fear of illness. Warns those who do not wear their mask when they go out in a limited time, hesitate to touch somewhere,
Such children, who do not want to even come close, are generally under the age of 10-12; In other words, they are children who cannot have a social environment alone and can socialize with their families. Therefore, they sometimes imitate and sometimes internalize their parents' feelings and perceive them as their own and fear them like their parents. The main issue that should be considered in the approach to these children should be the relationship of the parents themselves with the covid. Children borrow their parents' spirituality until their own spirituality is sufficiently developed and in dangerous environments. In this context, it is often a sufficient and necessary condition for a parent to think about and make sense of what he lends to his child. ''
Families should feel good before children
Stating that this process was temporary, Erol completed his words as follows: “In order to help our children feel better in the pandemic, we must first support ourselves to feel good. Whatever method is good for us, we should find it and put it at our bedside, not once or twice, but always apply to it: Book, music, painting, cinema, walking, writing, reading, listening, jumping, meditation, therapy, sports, yoga, education, like dancing. ''